From IMDB- ‘Christopher Columbus believes he can find an alternative route to the Far East and persuades the King and Queen of Spain to finance his expedition. But the Sultan of Turkey, who makes a great deal of money through taxing the merchants who have to pass through his country on the current route, sends his best spy, Fatima, to wreck the trip.’

Carry On Columbus was made 14 years after the last entry (Emmannuelle) and features actors who had previously starred in films within the series (including Jim Dale, Bernard Cribbins and June Whitfield) whilst it also boasted newer additions who were stars in their own right (including Rik Mayall, Julian Clary and Maureen Lipman).

But is the film any good? I remember an interview with Barbara Windsor who said she was asked to join the cast and was sent a copy of the script. She read it and thought it was so bad that she decided to go out and get hideously drunk to try and blot out how wretched it truly was. Obviously, she didn’t sign up.

I agree with her. The script is so bad, any vitality that the original films had in spades is completely missing here and the cast look embarrassing delivering such subpar material.

Also, the melding together of regulars and more modern stars just doesn’t work. I can understand why some of the newer comedy actors wanted to be involved as they will have grown up with the original films and so Carry On Columbus will have felt like a love letter to the franchise. But instead it feels like a kiss of death.

And how come, if the budget was higher that the original films do the sets look like an amateur dramatics production in a Wigan working men’s club? In fact, a night in any WMC would be far more entertaining than this. You’d also need to be rotten drunk to find anything redeemable about this atrocity.

Filmmakers don’t know when to stop and history is filled with sequels so bad that they feel like a stain on a series of film’s legacy. Halloween Resurrection is one. Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare is another. Carry On Columbus earns its place in this dubious club. It’s even worse than Carry On Emmannuelle. Yes, it’s that bad.

0.5 out of 5 stars